Breakfast in America

The Following is a pointless and matter of fact account of 18 days on the road with Van Homan. I have not travelled much with Van, He had about 10 mixed CDs from the 90’s, no I-Pod hookup, and goes to bed in Pajamas every night…

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Day 1…

It was thursday, January 2nd, and we decided to roll south from Richmond Virginia with sights set on the west coast. California dreaming…
The first 150 miles put us Raleigh North Carolina, near a satellite dish in someone’s backyard where we had grilled hamburgers with some friends and hit the road again, aiming to Cummings Georgia.
Cummings is about a half an hour north of Atlanta, it was late when we arrived, and a bad accident had closed the road entirely, forcing us to detour. We stayed with some friends in the woods, at the end of a super long wooded driveway. They had a fireplace, and in the morning made us breakfast. It was a good start to a long journey…

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Day 2…

Continue the drive south stopping in Montgomery Alabama, for lunch at the Louisa Cafe, and a cup of coffee. Pedaled my bicycle around a little to stretch my legs. I watched the sunset over some bayou bridges on interstate 10 on our arrival into New Orleans, it was a nice drive that put us in the by water, at a local dive bar called Markeys, for some food and a couple of cold beers. I put a couple of dollars into the jukebox and got to over hear some well-to-do young professionals, white people, honkeys actually, talk about being able to borrow from their 401k, the man speaking was berating his would be girlfriend about finances, It was uncomfortable…

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Day 3…
Woke up on a couch, to 60 degree temps, sunny weather, palm trees, and a bike ride around a really fucked up city. I like New Orleans. We had some coffee and some good breakfast at a neighborhood spot, the atmosphere was nice.
Ended up about 8 feet from a car getting t-boned at high speed, by someone running a red light at an off ramp from the highway. That was kind of intense. Hit up a Skatepark under the 10, ate at a BBQ place called the Joint and then watched a Championship football game at a local bar, New Orleans won, the fans were dancing and singing and getting shitfaced.

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Day 4…

Wake up and drive to Baton Rouge, ride some bikes with some good people, and hit the underpass spot, and the infamous Chase walls… We got back on the highway and drive several hundred miles, aiming for Austin Texas. On the way, we stop at truck stop in western Louisiana somewhere, that has real life, actual living Tiger, in a pen in the far end of a shitty parking lot, his name was Tony, go figure, and he did not look too happy to be there. Shitty little skids were tossing parking lot pebbles at him to try and get his attention.
We continued on the 10, passing through Houston, and eventually to Austin where we had dinner with some friends…

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Day 5…

Wake up to unusually cold temperatures in Austin, and hit the road, aiming for El Paso. Driving on a Secondary highway through hill country in Texas is pretty awesome, even when it’s freezing cold.
We drove all day, stopping for lunch in Sonora Texas, it was a monday, and every place in town was closed, so we pissed behind a 7-11, and drove Ozona Texas, and find a mexican place that’s open and get some really good burritos with steak and avocado and potato. Stoked on that…
End up in El Paso, staying with some new friends at a mansion on a hill.

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Day 6…
I woke up early in El Paso, and saw the sunrise over the city from a balcony a house on a hill. Not long after I was getting breakfast at a place nearby, where they did not speak english, but they made great food and it was enjoyable.
Ended up in a ditch near some railroad tracks, where bums lived. It was a great time, one of my favorites. Rode some bikes, in the sunshine and smiled big.
After a good session, we drove to Tucson, for dinner at a steak house, I ended up getting a Tattoo from and old friend, and a cup of coffee from a 6 foot 4 inch Hells angel with a winged skull tattooed on his face. He asked if I wanted room for cream and sugar. Back in the truck, we ended up in Phoenix for some sleep.

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Day 7…

Wake up in Phoenix, once again get breakfast, and end up in a drainage ditch looking for kicks. Have a quick session and start a long haul to California. Stopped for some gas station food, and notice a sign on a door near the restroom that read “Tokyo Massage”. I opted out, and we kept going, stopping only for a quick view of
some Dinosaurs near some palm trees and a burger king, and then dinner in a very residential neighborhood in southern California.

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Day 8…

Wake up on a couch in Lake Forest California. The neighborhood was straight out of a televised version of an suburban family utopia. I don’t even remember breakfast But I had a Couple weird cups of coffee.
We visited a bicycle factory and got lunch at a franchised sushi joint with some friends before piling in with an added passenger and drove the I- 5 north towards Fresno, we went through some crazy elevations and stopped for sleep at another friends house.

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Day 9…
Woke up on a floor near a sliding glass door and a space heater in a neighborhood that was probably pretty upscale in another time. Met up with some old friends, and met a couple new ones in a city I have never been to before.
We got some breakfast and then searched out some empty swimming pools in foreclosed and abandoned homes. we managed to session 4 in a day, and soon I was sick from wear and tear on the road through changing climates in the winter, and I turned in early for some rest.

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Day 10…

Home cooked breakfast at the host’s house in the morning was great. We hit 3 pools this day, and had lunch at a burger joint called Big Mommas. Hopped fences, scanned through backyard debris of people’s lives left behind, toys, weedwackers, fish tanks… Later that evening we got some groceries, cooked dinner and watched road house.

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Day 11…

Another wake up in California, searching for the American dream on the flip side of the coin so to speak…
We end up on the outskirts of Fresno on a dirt road, near vineyards, and sneak into an off season waterpark for session, Marty Moose said the park was closed but we had some fun regardless. Afterwards we end up in a dicey neighborhood at a deaf guy named Ray’s house. Ray lived in Squalor, essentially in an abandoned home, he didn’t have much, but he had an empty swimming pool, a rough smile and a friendly demeanor which he shared with us eagerly. We gave him some high fives, and few bucks for beer, and hit the road for Santa Cruz…

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Day 12…

We Stayed with some good friends in Santa Cruz, and woke up to breakfast and coffee which is always a bonus, single cup drip coffee. We were juiced,and after getting sorted, we set off to some local jumps, and then another empty swimming pool. Following that session we went to some more jumps, had a fire, some beers, and hangout shooting the shit. I saw a guy on a Harley sideswipe a dog that ran out in front of him as well…

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Day 13…

After a nice hangover for brunch, We hit up the dirt jumps and met up with some more old friends, Santa Cruz seems to be good for that. Hit up the Coast for a sunset session in an old cow pond, it was pretty rad to be on a ridge aimed westward over the Pacific, watching the sun go down. A t dark we went into town and got some pizza, a whoopi cushion, and some more smiles from more old friends…

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Day 14…
End up in Scotts valley California at a shitty pump track, and a skatepark that doesn’t allow bikes, which wouldn’t be a big deal, aside from an early morning uproar from some methy dog park patrons who got into it and one hit another with a mini van or something. Cops galore… Hit the road and aim east towards the mountains and end up at restaurant where locals congregated at the bar. We showed up at the Tale end of a showing of “Jewel of The Nile” followed by “Romancing the Stone” or vice versa.
The bar Patrons seemed stoked on the movie picks.
The drive east into the Mountains was the first time on the trip the sun set in the rearview mirror, we were now headed home…

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Day 15…

Went to a ski resort in Tahoe, and ate shit instantly trying to snowboard. The resort was literally a hundred yards of Interstate 80, and had a cement park at the bottom of the hill, enclosed in a modern steel barn, quick session, and back on the road. Met a local named Curtis, living out of the back of a pick up truck, with a cap, he offered us drugs for the road, and we set sail through Reno, Winnemucca, across the Salt Flats and into Salt Lake City. Driving the stretch between Wendover and SLC is surreal, a dark no mans land with no services, and optical illusions of altitude and surroundings that make you feel like you are driving through an acid trip.

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Day 16

Start the day at the Blue Pate Diner and have enough coffee to peel the inside liner off my bladder, before pulling a long haul to Denver. Stop at a truck stop in Wyoming for dinner, then hit I 25 south in Cheyenne until we hit Denver Colorado, where two weeks earlier that had legalized marijauna. Our Hosts warn us leaving Colorado with drugs, as its still illegal in neighboring states. The only thing I was smuggling was some seriously smelly laundry from a few weeks on the road, and a gatorade bottle I had pissed in.

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The next couple of days were spent spanning the distance between Denver and the East Coast with tired eyes, road worn, and ready for some comforts of home.
I got a gas station breakfast burrito that exploded onto my lap in the truck, and it was east bound from here on out.
We breezed through Kansas on I 70 amidst wind advisories, and piggy back trailers nearly being blown off the road, to mixed precipitation in St. Louis, gliding into Louisville Kentucky with the heat in truck going out. I had No Idea what Time zone we were in by the time I laid my head to rest.
After some sleep it was an early start we hit I 64 through the mountains of West Virginia, over the ridge and finally coasting into Richmond about 18 days after setting sail, and day dreaming across America…

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Steve Crandall

Coffee sipping pilot of a red FBM frame and a Nikon camera.